Feb 22nd

Kick start today with a nice lil circuit session – standard Saturday morning – just a little slower. Energy is still an issue but overall feeling good and strong today. I thought it was funny when lots of people waiting for KettleBells after circuit saw Ross’s juices and asked loads of questions. Oooo they look nice, is that the juice diet thing (they’re doing kettlebells so they aint einstein). What’s in them? (we don’t know – we reckon Horse shit with a hint of straw, some dust off the floor and a little ginger for flavour). Are they tasty? Have you lost any weight yet? All funny coz Ross was like Yeah, Dunno, No, Dunno. Seriously, not since boxing in ’88 have I been so nervous over a weigh-in.

I’ve got my stats recorded and cant wait to see if I’ve lost a pound or two :-)

To be honest, every atom of my being is looking forward to a simple bowl of noodles and king prawns (they’re my one weakness) and maybe some bread. It’s gonna have to be brown nutty bread. We’ll see :-)

kingprawn noodle

I just cant wait to sink my teeth into pretty much anything that isn’t a green juice. I’m fed up with them now and they’re starting to make me gag……..I think i am developing a bit of a phobia. I skipped last nights juice and just went to bed hungry. I figure I am as detoxified as I am gonna get. You’d think that I’d be so pure now that I wouldn’t even swear wouldn’t ya? Bollux to that. You try drinking what I’ve been drinking for the last 6 days. I reckon even the Pope would drop the odd F bomb half way through. He’d turn it into a prayer though. <Slurp> Oh sweet Jesus ‘n Mary Mother of God, please send down your winged angels to take this fuckin juice from me and protect me from Evil (or juice number 2)…Amen.

I keep wanting to chew a slice of bread (and spit it out….i’m no cheat) but I am too strong for that. I reckon this is Ross

donuts busted







When all this is done – ie, 7pm Tomorrow night, I’ll probably put all my stats on here. Start weight, waist measurement, chest measurement, pecker measurement (hope I’ve not lost any weight off my precious), bicep measurement etc. It’ll give some sense of progress and how much this diet has impacted (or otherwise) and will let me know if it’s been worth it. I’ll also put some lessons learned and Top Tips.

I think my before picture looks like this……






It has been bloody hard, some days a real struggle. It gets easier after day 4. Some stats I know off the top of my head. Poop = 2 (totally screwing with my Candy Crush progress). Pee = 4,306,189.


Me knob’s worn out.

He’ll have to go on a willy workout work out willy






Anyway, this day is done. 1 more juice tonight, 4 more tomorrow and weigh-in. Then it’s off to the pub for a nice scran.


Leave a Reply